As the trend toward smaller weddings continues, engaged couples need to get creative on how they create special roles in their weddings for cherished family and friends. Here are our suggestions!
Hey, Christie!
Help! Family drama overload!
My fiancé, Charlie, and I are both in our early 30’s and so excited to be getting married at Ainsworth House & Gardens this September!
Here is the potential family drama overload that we are facing:
Charlie would like to ask his two best buds from college to be best man and groomsman but this leaves out his younger brother, Tyler, who is 14.
I have a younger half-sister, Madison, who is 12 and has talked of nothing else than my wedding since Charlie and I announced our engagement.
She’s too young to fit in with my two bff’s but she’s completely oblivious to that.
What do we do?????
Thanks in advance for your guidance!
–Willow Worried in Wilsonville, Oregon
Hey, Willow!
I am here to help! This family drama—or even friend/sorority/fraternity drama—happens all the time. People build up expectations of how they will participate in your wedding as an honored member of the wedding party and then their expectations are dashed when they aren’t invited. Don’t fret! There are solutions! Here are my suggestions::
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If you have NOT announced who is in your bridal party, great! This gives you the opportunity to plan for additional roles at your wedding.
Think about this person and consider the list of other possible wedding positions which is coming up here. Match the person to the “job.”
a. Have a conversation with this person on how you would like to honor your familial bond or your friendship by inviting this person to do an incredibly special “job” at your wedding. Let them understand how valuable they are to them. Then explain what you want them to do. Anyone can be a bridesmaid or groomsman; it is a special honor for this person to be asked by you to sing a song, perform a reading during the wedding, give a toast, or anything else on this list.